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Tag Archives: Alcoholism

A new life of sobriety

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S-O-B-E-R

adj: 1. not affected by alcohol; not drunk. 2. serious, sensible, and solemn.

Being sober is something I have been planning on writing about for a while but for some reason I have been hesitating. I think it is because talking about alcohol seems to feel like a confessional, I felt too vulnerable and like I was laying myself bare. But I have decided the time has come, what with it being the new year and everything.

First of all I would like to state that this is just my personal account. I do not claim to be an expert on alcohol, alcoholism or addiction. All I know is my experience.

Me, the drinker

My drinking habits were what I would describe as normal for a drinker of my age. Since the age of 18, more or less, I drank alcohol about 2 or 3 times a week. Maybe one pint in the evening with friends during the week or, since living in France, a glass of wine or a pastis. I would then have the weekend binge drink, starting at home with some wine before heading out to bars to drink, dance, drink, talk, drink, flirt, get hammered. On the menu; a few glasses of wine, a few of pints, the odd shot of vodka or tequila, a cocktail.

Light through the trees, how to control alcohol.

Corny caption competition. Answers on a postcard, please.

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I drank because…

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For my beautifully intelligent and innocent niece who asked me why I used to drink.

I drank because I wanted to have fun, it was normalised, everyone did it.

I drank because my parents drank.

I drank because my peers drank.

I drank because despite the fear I felt about being drunk for the first time, I liked the loss of control. It made me bold to kiss boys and tell my secrets and dance all night.

I drank because I learned to like the taste of beer and wine. But never vodka. Vodka had to find a home in coke, ribena, milk. Anything to take away the sting. Read the rest of this entry

Glaucous and Tender is the Night

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G-L-A-U-C-O-U-S

adj Tech or Lit 1) A dull greyish-green or blue colour 2) Covered with a powdery bloom like that on grapes

Glaucous Sea

covered in a bloom?

“It was past four and under a blue-gray sky the first fishing boats were creaking out into a glaucous sea.”

Tender is the Night, F. Scott Fitzgerald.

I had this underlined from Tender is the Night not only to memorise my new vocabulary, but also beause I feel it is a wonderful example of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s prose. It is a simple phrase, setting the scene on the Côte d’Azur, simple but so beautifully put.  I fell in love with Fitzgerald whilst reading Tender it the Night, enjoying the quality of his language as well as his storytelling.

We follow Rosemary, a young American actress, as she holidays with her mother in the sun-drenched south of France. She starts to mix with the other wealthy guests from her hotel and soon becomes embroiled in their lives, falling in love for the first time with Dick Diver, a married man. Read the rest of this entry